Thứ Sáu, 31 tháng 8, 2018

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During my years of being a very gullible and impulsive teenager, out of all of the games

that I ended up borrow from kids that were a couple of years older than me, there was

a certain game that hit me harder upside the head than ever I could've imagined it doing;

that game was Haunting Ground.

Poor unsuspecting teenage Sophie didn't know what she was about to experience and although

she should probably have respected the game's mature rating, she was also way too curious

for her own good.

Which lead to many sleepless nights but also one of the most immersive video game experiences.

This video will contain spoilers for the game so heads up if you haven't played it and if

you are planning to do so in the future.

If you've already played the game or if you simply just don't care, feel free to safely

keep on watching.

The one area where Haunting Ground really shines is in its ability to make you feel vulnerable.

Of course making you feel helpless is a huge part of a lot of horror games, so I'm not

exactly praising the game for doing what a horror game is supposed to do; which is make

you feel scared and uncomfortable.

I want to praise it for how well it utilizes the objectification of its main character

to hit all the right, or I guess ''wrong'', notes.

''Bad'' notes?

Uncanny notes?

Yucky notes?

Who knows, I'm sure you catch my drift.

For a bit of backstory - Haunting Ground, also knows as Dementio, is a 2005 survival

horror game published by Capcom.

Fiona Belli, the game's main protagonist, is a wide-eyed 18-year old who one night,

after being involved in a car crash whilst in a car riding together with her parents,

wakes up in a large mansion only to quickly realize that she's been kidnapped following

the events of the crash.

Right off the bat, we're bombarded by unsettling elements.

Fiona wakes up alone in a place that's completely foreign to her.

She has no idea where she is and she has no one to ask for help, which is already an unnerving

situation.

Only made worse by the fact that she's also put in nothing but a sheet.

Meaning that her clothes and any valuables she might've had on her were stripped

away from her when she was unconscious.

Which is another scary factor, the idea of someone moving you around and undressing you

while you are unconscious.

And she doesn't exactly wake up on a king sized bed but rather inside a small iron cage

in what looks like a rogue butcher shop.

From here on out, it's up to Fiona to traverse the mansion in order to find her way out as

she escapes from the multiple stalkers inhabiting the mansion.

So the game not only forces her into an unknown location but it also adds the element of being chased.

Fiona is continuously objectified and dehumanized.

Each and every one of the game's villains show a different and very twisted desire and/or

lust towards Fiona.

Although his true intentions are a bit blurred due to his inability to properly communicate,

Debilitas keeps mentioning how he wants to keep Fiona as his doll.

His intent for chasing Fiona could arguably be seen as the least malicious as it's not

made clear whether he understands that he is hurting Fiona whenever he captures her.

If he only sees her as a doll or a toy it could imply that he doesn't understand that

she's a person that can feel pain.

Which could be why he's often seen throwing Fiona's body around like a rag.

So either he doesn't understand or he has the full intention of picking Fiona apart

with joy.

But regardless of whether Debilitas is aware or not, it doesn't make the situation any

less terrifying for Fiona.

All she knows is that a large man that could snap off her spine in a matter of seconds

is chasing her around, calling her his ''doll'', picking her up and throwing her on the ground

like she's a stuffed animal.

The second antagonist that Fiona comes across is Daniella, the resident housekeeper.

Although Daniella certainly isn't normal at any point during any encounter, initially,

her intent does not come across as malicious.

She's unsettling, for sure but she's not chasing you right off the bat.

It isn't until later that the player finds out about Daniella's deep-set jealousy towards

Fiona.

As it turns out, Daniella is unable to feel anything.

She has no sense of joy or sadness, she cannot feel either pain or pleasure and despises

Fiona for being so human - and therefore what is essentially her opposite.

Because Daniella herself is infertile, she hates Fiona for her ability to carry children.

That along with her beauty and how desired she is by Lorenzo, who is Daniella's master, it doesn't

take much to see how Daniella's jealousy came to grow.

She calls Fiona a ''pretty little princess'' and accuses her of ''luring men into her body.''

She calls Fiona filthy and shames her on numerous occasions without remorse.

After taking Daniella down, Fiona soon runs into Riccardo.

A clone created from the same man as Fiona's own father; essentially making him her uncle.

In general, Riccardo has a disregard for both emotion and any life that isn't his own.

He only sees being understanding of others and being compassionate as obstacles on the

track to obtaining knowledge and only wants to use Fiona's for his own gain.

Repeatedly threatening Fiona to give herself up to him and become ''the lady of the castle.''

Claiming he owns her and treating her being like his property.

Lastly, Fiona's final enemy is Lorenzo; a man who sees Fiona as one thing and one thing

only - a vessel for him to become immortal.

Much like Riccardo, Lorenzo only wants to use Fiona for her Azoth in order to become

immortal.

That is all that Fiona is to him; an offspring of his clone for him to use as he pleases.

Both Lorenzo and Riccardo see Fiona as their own property rather than an independent human

being.

Rather than seeing her as a person, all Fiona is to them is just the Azoth.

She's reduced to being the carrier of the one thing that'd benefit them.

So throughout your Haunting Ground experience you'll not only be dehumanized, objectified

and body shamed but also both physically and mentally abused.

Needless to say, this was a bit much for mid-puberty Sophie to take in.

I remember finding this game exhausting to play when I was younger because I'd always

be so on edge.

Where the game shines is in its ability to make you feel like a rat trapped in a labyrinth

with a group of scientists peeking down on you to observe your every move.

Very few games are as good at emulating this feeling as Haunting Ground is.

Although Haunting Ground is considered a spiritual successor to games like Clock Tower and there

have been many games that have come afterwards that have emulated a similar claustrophobic

setting, to me personally, none have ever made me feel as trapped as Haunting Ground

has.

It's made abundantly clear that although you can hide inside the mansion, you're never

really safe.

You're always in enemy territory with no one to help you get out.

Not to mention that Fiona is, not only just a teenager, but she's also a normal art student.

She's not a bounty hunter or an undercover detective out on a job to investigate the

mansion.

She's a very gentle girl, who is more than likely suffering from some sort of anxiety disorder.

She's physically weaker than the stalkers, she doesn't have access to their weapons and

she doesn't know the layout of the actual mansion; constantly putting her at a disadvantage

to everyone else.

So why would I still want to talk about this game?

Well, cause I strongly believe that the reason that Haunting Ground not only scared me as

much as it did but also left such a strong impression was because of when I played the

game.

People saying how playing a certain game at a certain point in their life lead to a very

special experience isn't anything groundbreaking.

Although I would probably still have been properly creeped out playing it at my current

age, it wouldn't have hit the same notes for me due to the fact that I'm just more matured.

Not in a sense that I've somehow grown out of being scared by horror games or that you

can suddenly just outgrow being scared of the horror genre but I've been desensitized

in a sense.

Which leads me to my point and why Haunting Ground managed to leave such an impression

on me.

Because I experienced it as a teenager; specifically a teenage girl.

I'm speaking from experience when I say that it was incredibly easy to relate.

Playing as someone like Fiona who was only a few years older than I was at the time,

running around a huge mansion being chased by people you didn't know if they were trying

to either kill you, sexually abuse you, eat you or maybe even all three, was a panic-inducing

scenario to say the least.

If you know the bad guy is just planning on shooting you in the back of the head and ending

it then and there, it's not as scary as opposed to someone who you don't know if they're going

to kill you, eat you and/or assault you.

Although you'll surely be able to put yourself in Fiona's shoes regardless of if you're 16

or if you're 35, you know as long as you've got the imagination, nothing's stopping you.

Being chased by a stalker who, very aggressively mind you, demands to be let into your womb;

I think is bound to hit harder for a teenage girl than it is for, let's say a guy in his

mid-twenties.

You know, in my mind that's not an unreasonable hypothesis.

In games like Amnesia or Alien Isolation or SOMA it's easier to relate regardless of where

you find yourself on the gender spectrum because the gender of the main character isn't really

relevant.

But because of how much Haunting Ground emphasizes Fiona's sexual attributes and fertility in

very explicit ways, it's not unreasonable to imagine that it'd hit harder for a girl.

Without having been trapped in a murder mansion stuck with ruthless killers, most young girls can

relate to the fear of being reduced to being nothing but your body.

And having that kind of fear amplified in a horror setting is not only scary but it

also gets under your skin because although it's only by a long shot, it still hits home

to a certain extent.

A good example of an opposite situation that comes to mind would be the Whistleblower DLC

from Outlast.

No, surely no one finds the idea of having their genitals mutilated comforting but specifically

having your ding dong almost cut off unwillingly is bound to be a bit more frightening for

the people that have one.

Although Whistleblower does again loop back to the main character running away from possibly getting

impregnated.

Anyway, I do realize that I am indeed outing myself by making this video because yes, I

did play Haunting Ground despite being underage.

That is just one of the glories, or I suppose horrors, of borrowing games from older friends.

So although mid-teenage girls aren't exactly the target demographic for a game like Haunting

Ground, I do earnestly think my experience was heightened by the fact that I did play

it as a teenager.

Don't misunderstand though, I'm definitely not advocating for under-aged kids to ignore

mature ratings on video games.

But in this particular case, I only really had myself to blame.

I saw the mature rating and full-on ignored it.

And although it was positively terrifying to go through it for the first time, it ended

up paying off as it's now one of the most memorable games I've played.

I can't recommend that anyone underage play it though with a clear conscience, but then

again, I did play it when I was underage myself so who am I to talk.

I can only assume that as a teenager, I found the idea of being forcibly separated from

my parents only to be treated like a piece of dog meat by weird strangers inside of a

big mansion even more scary than I would do now as someone who is of age.

Losing control and being objectified isn't a good feeling for anyone but as a teen I

found it to be way more scary.

Haunting Ground uses its perverse and grotesque nature to continuously make the player uncomfortable.

Outside of this horror game about a crazy old alchemist trying to use this poor young

woman to his own gain in order to become immortal, the game explores themes like mental illness,

emotional and sexual abuse, body dysmorphia, incest and of course gore.

It goes beyond ''just'' having Fiona be the eye-candy to get the player interested.

Fiona is undoubtedly eye-candy, but the people that are trying to get at her can and will

kill her if she's captured.

The fact that you are playing as the eye-candy is what is stripping all of your power from

you.

Haunting Ground doesn't treat Fiona's sexualization as something positive but it emphasizes

how desired she is by a group of people that want to either kill or impregnate her.

Of course there's the argument that it's only obvious that I would feel scared playing Haunting Ground

as I wasn't of age to play it.

But Haunting Ground wasn't the first horror game I played at that point in my life.

I had played multiple titles before even touching Haunting Ground but none of them stuck with

me in the same horrifying way that Haunting Ground did.

As an adult now although I do find it very strange to say it, I think the ideal way for

the game to really transfer it's disgusting take on horror is for it to be played by late

teenage girls.

That's not to say that I would encourage underage people to play it but if you are in the same

age range as Fiona, there's no denying that the game is definitely more terrifying.

In short, I can safely say that after having played Haunting Ground all those years ago,

I did regret it.

There were times I wish I hadn't started it and that that one older kid hadn't recommended

it to me.

But as an adult, I'm still so happy that I went through with it because it still stands

out in my memory 'til this day.

So although all experiences may not be fun when you're going through them, it might be

worth it in the long run.

And please remember to pray to Capcom for a Haunting Ground remaster!

I hope you enjoyed this video, thank you so much for watching.

For more infomation >> How Haunting Ground scarred my teenage self - Duration: 17:07.

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True Authentic Bullshit Self IYP #75 - Duration: 13:37.

What is up beautiful people

Mad Max here aka Massimo

Rock and we is trying our hardest to get

connected me and John I am in a

one-horse

village

Which is a beautiful spot no disrespect, but the Internet has been oh, there's John yo, yo, okay. Let's see

Can't even add the guy what is going on here people. I

Cannot add you John. I don't know what is going on man, huh?

Like comment I

Got this, yeah

Invite friends Oh John, I figured it took a long time, but I think I got think I got it. I

Invited you John Barrett

But I see nothing happening Johnny, give me a sign where are you my friend

What if I could do this John one second, can I search good night your purpose

Nope

Cancel that

Only took me 450 years to figure it out connecting my god, there it goes. I don't know if that's like the new

Can you hear me I

Can hear you can you hear me? Can you see me?

Yes

Baby, yes

We talk slowly we give each other chance to finish

Because you are you're a bit fuzzy today. I don't think you've been out on the on the B Rio just yet. So

Hey everybody apologies, this is a bit of a random episode but episode

75

third or fourth attempt at starting and

I

didn't even think we should just talk about anything yet and just

Let's talk about the challenges of life that come up and bite you on the ass

random limit we deal with it, but

Episode 75 I think max came up with this subject a few days ago

rolling on from

Subjects this week and he was talking about I think Twitter's Don the purge

social media being like dislikes followed

fake pages

washee-washee vibe me

Yeah, I was just that's what happened. Right a bunch of bunch of guys from

You know our circle of putting out content and all that. We're having a freakout session because well first it was Facebook

Then it was Instagram now, it's been now, it's Twitter

It was a couple days ago and we've been hearing room willings that Instagram will do it again, right?

So basically what's happening is is they're going in there and whatever they're doing

Deleting fake accounts. I'm not sure what it is, but people's following numbers and their their few counts are going way down, right and

It's as we've seen

affecting a lot of people and the reason I think you and I want to talk about it was simple is because

You know we want to talk about what's fake and what's real

you don't I mean

Yeah, I think I came up with the year with earlier the euro your true self your authentic self or your bullshit self

What you're watching online?

he will be checking out these people with the perfect lives and the perfect cars and the the haircut the Gucci suits and

died in the background

Do you know can we think that people's it might be true people's genuine live in their true authentic

Experience or are they?

creating this kind of

imaginary perfect life to try and entice you into

Following them and liking them whether that's for their own

Ego of having a million followers or to get you to sign up to a course

and I think this

I

think it's connects because I think from from the get-go Max and I have said

you know, we hope not to want to try and create any courses or

Get to sign up for anything

or give you any

bullshit holiday romance

Ideas about our lives. We will just kind of fini our genuine authentic selves each and every day and of course, you know,

We are quite fortunate we have grafted and worked and we do get to go to nice places

But there are days

When I look to my armpits in tins of paint and drop on the mobile phone and the ten abate and things

so we just want to

Share with you our experiences. Do you know what we couldn't give a monkey's about the lights and the follows? It is interesting

So we can get a vibe on who's engaging with us and whether there's a connection or whether our subject matter works

For you, but it is not working view. It may work for somebody else. So would you think about that max?

Hi Ryan, I tie. Hi Anton. Hi Isabel. Yep

What's up, Lena from the from over in the UK? Love it. Um

She's actually I just met her a couple months ago or whatever. Yeah, she's some family. I didn't even know I had it's so cool

Yeah, so

The the reason this came about to is in the music biz, you know

you start hearing stories and I was starting to hear stuff like

there was certain guys in the game who would put

make it look like they were wearing jute like

You know crazy thick jewelry worth hundreds of thousands of dollars. And then what I came to find out was because they actually had

Numbers on their thing. So when I go into their page or you wanted a page or whatever and it says

You know 2 billion followers, right which is a fake number, but I'm just gonna throw it out there first, you know

jeweler jeweler luigi would say hey where my stuff and

this guy's would make me think and this is one of the

You know friends of a friend told me was oh, he doesn't actually have that jeweler. He doesn't own any of that stuff

It's just been given to him but yet us as the viewers were

it gets to the fact that

Everybody's faking the funk right except for those who are doing it real and and John and I were talking like, yeah

What's the whole point of us doing this? Is it is it to get three more views?

so it looks like we have 10,000 views a week or a hundred thousand views a week or

500,000 views a week

That's not the point

the point for me was I wish at 16 when I was out of the house and I was going through the turmoil and

You know looking up to the sky wondering what the hell I could do that. Somebody was there to help me, right?

Yeah

so we in this society where it's instant gratitude and

There's a lot of impressionable minds out there and I don't care if you're 15 or 55, right?

Faking the funk is bullshit, and we need more real, you know

and that's that's why I want to come on and talk about that John like, you know, there's there's

People again when I go back to the music thing

You know talking like they got money and they they've made all these deals when you know, I come to find out you know

They settled the divorce and they put money in the bank or they've you know

Signed a deal under a deal under a deal under a deal and they're actually not making the money, but they're you know

Because they have viewers they get stuff given to them and they they just front like it's something that it's not right. Yeah. Well then

Give it to me this week

On my 14 year old nephew

Who's he's on a ski cross GB training camp thing and he's giving me shit. So I'm gonna share that to my nephew

Ellie

Which is good

I'm not sure. I've got anything else to add really I did have summit but

When you get old you need to kind of say things as they come up

Saving them for later

Because sometimes they just freakin vanish into thin air, but that's our

That that was our odds our discussion on what what's real and what's not real?

And we hope with genuine noid and we hope rot then yeah and every now and again

we've got something of interest that you may like to listen to or

there might be a quick fix on your nutrition or meditation or stress or relaxation or

Whatever it might be that will resonate with you as it did for us back in a day and oh that was it

We're talking about being real

Ever long enough

we are now I was I was thinking back to

When I was living in Munich a few years ago, and I was at I was in dark place

How is this the press that you can imagine really deeply unhappy? And when I was there I drove my car off a cliff

You know these big Australian switchback roads now yeah a time

I genuinely thought it was an accident had a big four-wheel-drive howdy

Brand-new winter tires by law out there and I popped up the map to CMA said hello

And when I came down I like to look going around the corner

And I was just thinking

Did that happen on purpose did was that your subconscious saying man? I'm

freaking pissed off with life and it would just be easier to put

three thousand foot drop and I went off the edge of it and the car landed on the ID badge in the middle on a

Bloody twig that stopped me roll. I've got great Polaroid of it on the Facebook somewhere and

so

That's being authentic and genuine and questioning things in your life. Sure. Nice nice episode now and say

Well, that was either a genuine mistake or if it did happen some big dude set upstairs just saying

Not yet fucking big boy. You've got something else to share

This can wait old is to get there. It may have been last month where I did my speaking gig after a 20 year

freaking feeling petrified of public speaking because the army drill the shitter be

But now I've come to face that fear and challenged it

nice to share to talk about my experiences to

You know

Just have a chat and I won't be the best public speaker in the world

And I may not have anything to say or resonate with you or with max

But it might help somebody and if I can share the experiences I've had

Through the good red bag the good the bad the ugly in the past

Then that's what I'm gonna do

Absolutely

that's no that's that's beautiful John and you know the sad thing being

For me is, you know at our age even John, you know

You passed fifteen when you're super influenceable right when you're super, you know

You believe everything you see in here as we get older 20 25 30. I mean, I'm still believing it

You know I'm saying and and that's what's bullshit. So let's start bringing out the real let's start calling these people out man

You know you and I I came from nothing man

I know how hard it takes to get something and it doesn't happen overnight and it shouldn't be now. We're all human so

yes, everybody pays attention to the analytics rate the the numbers the this that but we're not trying to sell anything and

We're just you know as at the basis form trying to keep it real by helping others

That's where it should start and if it grows from there, perfect

but to those who are faking the funk be at least a hunts in a while with somebody and

Because people are influenceable, especially the youth event and that's all I have to say John. Yeah, go say hi to

Ryan just you too rod. Thanks for listening and

Max and I were just two dudes that met in the mountains a couple years ago in Canada

And we get on and we think we've had a few life experiences between us we're gonna share it. We appreciate you listening

It wasn't sure it wasn't it wasn't Brokeback Mountain rage on

And

Emma says is three people living in the sounds as I'm sure Sheena does but

Yeah, it's good. I'm enjoying it. Max is enjoying it

That's all I've got to say. You could be anywhere you listening to us. We appreciate it and

We'll see you tomorrow. Well, I think we're going to review a podcast tomorrow a pretty incredible story either this week. So

Be sharing that for all the the athletes out there the translates

Well, the criminals out there does there's a correlation and the connections?

That's true. I

Hope I hope the one-horse town gets a little more internet connection John

See that baby bye-bye. Check what

For more infomation >> True Authentic Bullshit Self IYP #75 - Duration: 13:37.

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Experience on self forgiveness | Guided meditation - Duration: 8:02.

hi I am Maurice Kok author of the book the journey of an ascended master and in

this video I'm gonna take you in an experience on self forgiveness so stay

tuned take a couple of deep breaths before we go into this experience I want

to notice that the past is in the past

present is today in the future you will be there once we're going to focus

ourselves put in a moment the present

nor would we keep living in the past people living in this events what

occurred the blame on yourself he killed that you feel and the defense we're

running through your system in your mind all the time your energy is leaking your

energy is flowing away there's no joy in life anymore

when this keeps going on I really have to move beyond you really have to set

yourself free from this inner burdens

this inner places the dark places in you the dark times where you have been in

this all doesn't matter anymore you have to forgive yourself we have to

move beyond this is easier said than done we would like to forgive ourselves

we would like to move beyond one of anything in the world but any every time

you try to every time you think I'm done now I'm over it you still keep

thinking about it you still keep having it in your presence every time you in

your son you meet someone or you hit a memory in your brain directional links

to the events to the happenings and they killed and blamed to yourself

we are here to move beyond we are here to forgive yourself but in order to

forgive yourself I want you to go back to that event I want you to think about

it and you have to be totally okay to what happened you have to be okay to do

whatever you did to be the person you were no matter what happened you have to

be okay no matter what was you hurt no matter

what you have done

it is okay you don't have to live with the blame and a guilt anymore you don't

have to live with it if you want to move beyond be okay with it

the moment you can be okay but what you have done who you have been and what

happened

you can be here in the present and you can forgive yourself you can forgive the

one you wear back then you cannot change it you cannot go back

and undo it the only thing that you can do is to be okay and stop blaming

yourself stop blaming the you who did this

and breathe back all your energies out of the moment into the non moment take

all your energies with you when you're moving from that time period back here

in the present not just a bit but every single cell every single piece of energy

raises back here in an hour moment so that you finally can forgive forgive

yourself and finally can move beyond be fully here present to have you in your

energies all here now

you are now ready to forgive yourself you are now ready to live here now you

are now ready to be to be fully present

thank you for being here subscribe to my youtube channel if you like my video

because there's so much more coming you know Commendation weeks a month so

you stay updated wanna run new material coming your way and share this video

with your friends if you feel they may need it

you

For more infomation >> Experience on self forgiveness | Guided meditation - Duration: 8:02.

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How To Do A Self Tape Audition - Part 4 - Duration: 3:04.

- Welcome back!

You made it.

Part four, how to do a self-tape audition.

Today, we are talking about

one of the most crucial elements, editing.

You need to be able to send

what you've just done onto casting.

And Marc is going to explain it to you.

- File size is crucial.

I've even read from certain casting directors

that they won't accept files that over the size recommended.

And the reasons could range from

that they don't want to take forever downloading them

because they might be viewing it on their smartphones

or a website that your audition videos are being hosted on

that may have certain restrictions.

So, let's take you through editing very quickly.

Now, the only cuts you'll be making is at the very beginning

or the end of your scene, if there's extra space.

Do not cut anywhere else in your audition.

Your scene should run from beginning to end

without any edits, just one take.

If a casting director asks for a title card,

it'll be a blank screen with your name

and any other information that's requested.

Read the directions carefully.

Once you have that, you can fade in

or fade out where your scene begins and ends.

Or, if you have multiple scenes, fade in between.

Now to your question, you're completely done editing,

you're ready to export your file to a certain size.

Now, every program is slightly different,

but for the most part, during this stage the program

you're using will have options on sizing at that point.

For further details regarding that,

do a quick video search of your program

and I'm certain you'll find tons of information.

And lastly, label the files exactly as requested.

And if there are no instructions, label the file,

your name, the role, and the project title.

- Holy smokes, there was so much in that video.

Thank you for sharing that with us.

- You're welcome, you're welcome.

And I know it's a lot of information,

but once you do it a couple times,

you'll get into the rhythm of it.

And then your audition tapes will begin to thrive.

- Absolutely, and then it even becomes fun, right?

Because you get to take a little more pride in your work.

- Yeah, it's like you're making your own movie,

your own miniature movie.

- Absolutely.

So, thank you so much for having us at Jive Duck Studios.

It has been an absolute pleasure.

And, good luck to everyone at home with your auditions

and your self-tapes.

- And have fun.

(soft instrumental music)

For more infomation >> How To Do A Self Tape Audition - Part 4 - Duration: 3:04.

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New to Self Publishing? Writing Tips for New Writers - Duration: 5:46.

A lot has changed since I started writing.

If you're a new writer, you can't really look at bestselling indie authors right now

and be assured that what worked for them will work for you now.

In this video, I'm going to talk about how to start a writing career today, what I'd

do differently, and what I would avoid.

What's up, guys?

My name is Michael La Ronn with Author Level Up, helping you write better and faster.

If you're new here, consider subscribing, and click the little bell to get helpful writing

videos every week.

I remember when I was just starting out on my writing journey.

I was determined, but scared.

There was so much to learn.

This was during the end of the Kindle Gold Rush, so it was still the wild west as far

as self-publishing goes.

I started with nothing.

My first month of publishing, I made $5.79, and that doesn't really count because I

sold two books, and my mom bought one copy, and my friend bought the other.

I went for months with zero sales.

And I'm still not a bestseller yet, so maybe my advice will be more helpful for you guys

since I'm closer to some of you newbies.

When it comes to the topic of starting out, so many people are looking for answers to

the KDP Select question.

I answer that elsewhere, but honestly, I think it's irrelevant.

Whether you do KDP Select or not, if you don't get the basics of writing craft and marketing

down, it won't really matter if you're exclusive or wide.

If I were starting out today, the first thing I would do is make a list of all the things

you need to learn: book formatting, story craft, marketing, Photoshop, websites, etc.

I'd break all of those into sub-categories, and I would go learn them, one-by-one.

I'd invest money where it made sense, including courses.

The sooner you can get yourself acquainted with the best practices, the better off you'll

be.

Most people don't take their learning seriously.

They just wander about, not really learning how to format a book or write an opening to

a chapter or create an engaging website.

My problem was that I tried to learn everything at once, which backfired on me.

If I had to do it again, I would be more systematic about it.

For tips on what to learn, check the video description for a video I did a while back

on creating a learning plan for yourself.

Another thing I'd do differently is that I would have jumped into video sooner.

Video is still the number one way to stand out in today's environment, and if I had

done it sooner and had been more serious about growing my channel when I started, it would

have accelerated my growth.

Video is an easy way for people to get to know you, or feel like they know you.

99% of people are so terrified of it that you'll be in the elite 1% if you do it.

Video has a learning curve, to be sure, but I've always considered that curve to be

a barrier to entry for people who aren't serious about it.

Video will teach you about copywriting, marketing and promotion, audience engagement, and production

quality ten times faster than blogging or podcasting.

Video is all about keeping people's attention.

If you can do it with video, you can do it with anything.

When I started off, I had a crappy blog.

I didn't even know what copywriting was.

I wrote about trite things that no one cared about.

I tried a solo podcast back in 2014, and it bombed.

If I had just spent some money on a DSLR and learned how to shoot high-quality video and

showcase my personality that way, it would have worked better for me.

When you do video like me, it makes you appear like an instant expert, even if you're not.

It's still unusual right now for writers to do video.

I would take advantage of that.

A video once or twice a month telling your readers what you're working on, what you're

reading, and some fun items to keep people engaged, like trivia or bad jokes or something.

Let people get to know you, and link to those videos in the back of your books and in your

email newsletters.

Another thing I would have done differently is that I would have studied the works of

mega-bestsellers religiously.

John Grisham, Stephen King, Nora Roberts,—those writers.

I'm learning advanced craft techniques from them right now that are making me look at

my early work and cringe.

But I'm learning craft faster than I ever did when I was reading blogs and listening

to podcasts.

And the final thing I would have done differently is that I would have tried to think longer

term about the craft skills I would need.

For example, I could have learned to write character injuries more convincingly into

my stories by learning the basics of injuries, and what happens when someone gets shot, for

instance.

I could have learned more about science and space physics.

I could have learned more about my country's legal system so I could write it accurately.

As I look at my career now, the areas where I'm weakest are the areas where I could

have done more research into basic facts of life.

But I didn't know what I know.

If I could go back, I would learn about: injuries, guns, how to research historical times correctly,

police procedure, legal systems, and military operations.

It's amazing how those things come up in your novels all the time.

Better to learn how to do it right.

In case you're curious, there are some things I'd do the same if I had to start all over

again.

I invested a lot of time in mastering Scrivener and Ulysses.

That paid off for me.

Learning how to format my books on an advanced level paid off for me.

Writing poetry and short stories helped me.

Writing across genre helped me.

I'd do those all over again.

Anyway, that's the advice I'd give you if I were just starting my writing career

today.

If you're a new writer, enjoy it.

Despite all the mistakes I made, I still look back on my early years fondly.

If you're new to writing, I put together a playlist of videos that will help you get

your bearings and get started with confidence.

I've got videos on writing craft, the best podcasts and blogs, and of course, writing

books to help you start your career off on a solid foundation.

You can check it out right here.

That's it for this video.

If this is your first time watching, I'd love to have you subscribe.

Every week I publish videos just like this one with writing advice to help you write

better and grow your influence with readers.

I'll see you in the next video.

Thanks for watching.

For more infomation >> New to Self Publishing? Writing Tips for New Writers - Duration: 5:46.

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Quarter of 14-year-old girls self-harm, study finds, amid warning of  'crisis in children's mental h - Duration: 7:33.

 One in four 14-year-old girls has self harmed, Children's Society research has found, as it finds girls are more unhappy than boys at school for the first time

 Using data based on a survey of 11,000 people, the charity estimated that nearly 110,000 children aged 14 - 76,000 girls and 33,000 boys - may have self-harmed across the UK during the course of one year

 Matthew Reed, chief executive at The Children's Society, said the findings were "deeply worrying"

 The data also shows that girls are less happy than boys with school life, a reversal of earlier trends that showed girls have been happier than boys since 2003

 The charity analysed data from the Understanding Society survey, which includes children between 11 and 15

They were asked to rank their happiness with various aspects of life out of 10.  The overall happiness gap between girls and boys has also widened significantly, with the most recent data showing that boys rate their lives as 8

17 out of 10 on average while the average for girls was 7.8.  Girls are still significantly happier than boys with their schoolwork, which suggests that the social side is causing them unhappiness

 Mr Reed told the Daily Telegraph: "We hear a lot about how the pressure cooker of exams impacts upon children but we found that girls were happier than boys with their school work

 "This suggests something else may be affecting how girls feel about school. We found that jokes and comments in school about looks and sexual activity, and sharing of photos or videos of classmates' bodies all had a big impact on girls

 "Maybe some boys feel this kind of attention boosts their 'street-cred', but this is not true of girls

 "These things made girls feel much worse about their appearance and their life as a whole, and may help explain why they are more likely to feel depressed or to selfharm

" Numbers to call  One young person told the charity: "I felt like self-harming was what I wanted to do and had to do as there was nothing else I could do

I think there is help for young people but not the right kind of help.  "Feeling not pretty enough or good enough as other girls did contribute towards my self-harming, however, I don't feel just being a girl is the reason as I think boys feel the same way too

"  Almost half of 14-year-olds who said they had been attracted to people of the same gender or both genders said they had self-harmed (46%), analysis revealed

 Matthew Reed, Children's Society chief executive, said: "It is deeply worrying that so many children are unhappy to the extent that they are self-harming

 "Worries about how they look are a big issue, especially for girls, but this report shows other factors such as how they feel about their sexuality and gender stereotypes may be linked to their unhappiness

"  Mr Reed said that ministers now needed to act.  He said: "Early support for vulnerable children and families in the community, which can help prevent mental health problems from developing, is also vital, and ministers must urgently address the £2 billion funding shortfall facing council children's services departments by 2020

" Don't call us snowflakes - it damages our mental health, say young people  Roy Perry, who chairs the Local Government Association children and young people board, said the figures revealed a "crisis in children's mental health"

 He added: "This is why we are calling for councils and schools to be given the funding to offer independent mental health counselling so pupils have access to support as and when they need it

 "Councils across the country work hard to ensure children and young people can access the support they need

However, with children's services facing a £3 billion funding gap by 2025, this is getting increasingly difficult

 "Many councils are being forced to cut early intervention work, including youth services, which helps children avoid reaching crisis point, perform better at school and avoid mental health issues in later life

"  He added: "We need to develop a system that says yes, rather than no, to children when they ask for help

" Comment | Self-harm in teenagers  Dr Max Davie, officer for health promotion for the Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health (RCPCH), added: "Education around issues like appearance, gender stereotypes and sexuality is also desperately needed and should be included in the new relationships and sex education curriculum

 "This country's mental health crisis is not going to go away overnight, but with appropriate action from Government, there is hope that fewer children will have mental health worries and be happier with their life as a result

"  The Good Childhood Report draws on the Children's Society's annual survey of 10-to-17-year-old children and their parents from 2,000 socio-economically representative households in England, Scotland and Wales

 The report also uses the Millennium Cohort Survey, which follows the lives of 11,144 children born in the UK in 2000-01

 The Department for Education has been contacted for comment.

For more infomation >> Quarter of 14-year-old girls self-harm, study finds, amid warning of  'crisis in children's mental h - Duration: 7:33.

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Part 3 of 3 on Authentic Leadership : How self-belief is needed for Authentic Leadership - Duration: 1:17.

part three today is on self-belief is it

continuing to focus on authentic

leadership I want to talk about self

belief self belief is critical to being

authentic because otherwise we're never

going to be able to express what we feel

and personal example for me while I'm

aware of self-doubt today in my younger

days I used to have a lot of self-doubt

and through positive thinking I would

hide that and I would speak what other

people I felt needed to hear rather than

just speaking instinctively and saying

what I felt so that is the key to

authentic leadership or a key because

you need to believe that it's just okay

to say what you feel without being so

hung up on other people's opinions so

I'm proud to say that I do that these

days and say what I feel because that's

what I feel and am confident enough

to know that not everyone will agree and

that's fine that's their opinion but

being authentic is key to believing in

what you want to say or who you are it's

the journey

For more infomation >> Part 3 of 3 on Authentic Leadership : How self-belief is needed for Authentic Leadership - Duration: 1:17.

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Basic Self Awareness IYP #71 - Duration: 9:32.

Suns coming in yeah

You talkin to my Tolkien ah

I'm easy like Sunday morning

ha ha Monday morning Monday afternoon -

Welcome to the show

We've mentioned awareness self awareness, what is it, how is it how to do how'd you get there a number of times?

Ok long journey from day one the first kind of glimmer of it

Which we touched on a few episodes ago or pop the link

to where we are now to where we've got to go which is

Way down the road

But we're gonna talk about the very basics not necessarily how we became self-aware, but the skills

Or the drills or the little hooks that we put in place

So we created so we thought about our actions

Okay

Yep, a is 71 is the episode people saw one of the ignitor purpose Show podcast vlog it

Is us? Thank you for joining John was so excited to start talking about awareness

So my journey, how did it begin? How do you keep it up? And and what are the triggers?

the first thing is

Questioning why we think and do what we do. So every time you have a reaction

Right to what your mum said what your dad said what your sister said?

Well, your lover said what your coworker said what wrote what the person the driver in front of you did

To not just react this right there in that moment to not just react is self awareness

you are then allowing a quick breath or whatever the hell you're

Your outlook is on it is a blink of the eye, whatever

You're allowing you

whatever you want to say you is to step in and

Stop the automatic chain reaction of

Reacting to a programmed mind

so just taking a split-second to Bri that if you want to look like a firing cable break that

automatic mind

Trained reaction because we need to question. Well, why do we react like that? That's what being aware is

so for example, if

You're walking across the street someone else hits you, you know - instead of like go about baccarat, you know, you bastard

Go well, dude. I I've been in that situation - oh, I didn't see the guy Oh

Bee stung, you know go on and on. Yeah

Exactly it's not a you against him. It's not an ego based thing

So you just question why am I reacting like this?

And as always it's gonna be through a series of program and training you've had since birth

But it's using your mind not letting your mind use you

Don't be the tool use your effing tool

boom

Somebody woke up on the right side

It's amazing I sleep and rest will do to your time. Yeah, so that matches says he's talking about with

bonding on reacting and that's so almost phase 2 or the next stage first page is

actually registering

when you're going into this automatic behavior, it's kind of the same kind of different and

And we lied when I first did this I frickin yellow post-it notes took

Everywhere in the car in the bathroom in the kitchen

in the frickin place and so when I did something or said something

And I then look at one of these notes saying what did you say that?

Why did you behave like this?

What did you make a cup of tea?

Because I always used to make a cup of tea when I got upset. That was my default behavior going with you

Come on, or sit down have a warm cup of tea. I'll be okay. Well that's training behavior

But I'd say something would do something and I'd see little note I'd go

We did you just can't hit you brother. Why did you just

Why did you just growl like this car driving the other way and that's the first

That's the first phase

Recognizing when you do something the next step is

to take the breath and

to be able to

respond rather than react

and even not respond if you don't need to and then

You can analyze your behavior and your actions and where that comes from or where that's driven from and

Is that something you're doing or you are you just been compliant with

society because you you're in a situation and you want to behave in the normal way that

we all behave which may or may not be the right way, but

That's it from me

Yeah, I I would agree and I'm trying to you know, I can always see now, especially when I go back to family gatherings

you

See the people who are no and I don't mean it's disrespectfully who just are not self-aware and I used to to act

Identically to them when it comes to mother father son daughter, you know, all that type of interaction

Now I don't and I'm trying to think back to

How how it was?

Just reacting in that first step of just breaking that

You know

Cutting that wire, you know what I mean? And it's just it's just wanting to do it. It's just questioning everything like, you know,

there is no need to for me it would it would be to always be right, you know, I mean

there is no need for that because I

Might as well talk to a brick wall and try and prove to the brick wall. I'm right if

Nobody's being aware and coming from their higher selves

It is it's it's two brick walls talking to each other right because nobody's let it ready to listen

and and just trying to figure out

You know, you want to call it breath. You want to call it blinking?

just that pause and

Question everything question what your brain is doing? Because your mind is using you unless you use it

That's the simplest form. I can break it down to

Yeah, and then when we can do this

You know leading by example, but people will see your behavior how much

karma, and what's

more reason you might

And they'll just pick up we just share the energy and vibrations and the good vibes and

Then hopefully the people in and around your your circle

Become a little bit more self-aware and what you're they're more mellow and

the whole shitload more connected in know

I'm gonna back you up on that. So, you know John, I've been how many years in my game

When's eleven when are you 11 years in the game doesn't sound this room not till next summer, um, so

When I began right I was in a beginners class. There was nobody

Except for the teacher that was experienced when we started meditating

One two three minutes was near damn impossible. All right, the beginners joining our advanced class now and you've been there so you know this

our minimum is

15 to 30 minutes with a new beginner. There is no way at my beginning with a bunch of beginners

You could go that long yet

You join in on that?

Energy wave that vibe of the experience. So that is a hundred percent proof of what you just said

By feeding your class has the smooth beginner. I'm gonna say 30 minutes. I'm thinking

Just and the charity back or on the floor and absolutely I can't say it 30 minutes

But you do and you're right

We're no different to each other. Of course you can do it and that's where the meditation creates a space in the mind

To respond rather than reacting all connecting man, but everything's connected. We know that

John I thank you for your time

Brother you thank you for your time

We know you could be anywhere in the world and you rock it right here with us, and we appreciate

That's all I gotta say, John

And usually we just rock up with these subject on the day

I had a couple today and I kind of threw one in the air

But we're just so we discussion opposing invents over this weekend

Pretty much from subjects lined up all week. They're countable

Interconnect and intermingle. So we

Hope you will be back tomorrow for story about grizzly bears tears

Baby cow, Oh baby calves, so on that note for me. Goodbye from him. Goodbye

See you later

For more infomation >> Basic Self Awareness IYP #71 - Duration: 9:32.

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Police: Man, 94, Inappropriately Touched 2 Women, Exposed Self At Rehab Center - Duration: 2:06.

For more infomation >> Police: Man, 94, Inappropriately Touched 2 Women, Exposed Self At Rehab Center - Duration: 2:06.

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Shri Mataji Talk about (Self Realisation) in Cambridge England 1984 [Subtitle] - Duration: 19:56.

you you

all right now better we have our realization is a better thing to do

you all have to take out your shoes I'm happier already darling it's very good

because as I told you the elements have to help us so the mother earth helps us

a lot especially this Kundalini is placed in the triangular bone which we

call as the mooladhara is they is the support support of the root and the

centre below that is the mooladhara chakra is the is the centre of the

support of the rule and is made from the same element the earth element and

that's why the mother earth helps us a lot when we put our feet on her with

respect with respect now put your feet on the mother earth parallel ways

because we are made of two types of personalities one is the left handed

result right so what we have to do is to keep them parallel whichever way is the

problem passes out to the mother earth and then you have to put both the hands

towards me just like after that you have to close your eyes just close your eyes

and to remember that your right hand is for action and left hand is for desire

so you put your left hand all the time towards me like this on your lap you

have to be comfortable so that you are not disturbed for the left hand and now

right hand you put it on your heart and close your eyes whatever we have to

do we will do with our right hand on the left hand side and that's very simple

which I will tell you one after another keep your eyes shut please don't open

your eyes if you open your eyes the Kundalini will go back so please keep

your eyes completely shut now you put your right hand on your

heart where resides your spirit spirit is the reflection of God Almighty and

the Holy Ghost is the reflection of the primordial mother his power so now what

you have to do is to bring forth the yoga this the union of these two you

have to say assert in your heart or ask me a question a simple question three

times mother am I the spirit mother am I the spirit mother am I the

spirit

now on the left-hand side again you must know that as you can ask this question

about the spirit you have to know also that you are your own master because if

you are the spirit you are your own master you don't need anybody to tell

you so you have to our second question by putting right hand on the upper part

of the stomach on the upper part of the stomach you have to ask the question by

putting your right hand on the upper part of the stomach and saying mother am

I my own guru please ask this question three times mother am I my own guru

mother am I my own guru now three times asking this question you

put down your right hand down below on the stomach on the left hand side please

do not open your eyes put it on the left hand side here

on the left hand side now here you have to ask a question

mother can I be initiated ask a question within yourself three times mother can I

be initiated without feeling guilty three times

now I say yes so to initiate yourself you ask you say mother please teach me

please give me the knowledge of the divine please give me the true knowledge

please give me the pure knowledge that's what you have to ask because I cannot

force it upon you you have to ask for it please put the hand

now six times because there are six patties

now raise this hand higher again onto the same stomach point where I told you

is the center of the primordial master press it hard here now on the stomach on

the left hand side in the upper part of the abdomen here you ask me a question

mother as you have asked me already am I my own guru you can say without

asking a question with full asserting with full right with full confidence

mother I am my own must please say 10 times mother I am my own master

okay now raise your right hand on your heart

here resides your spirit and here you have to say with full assertion mother I

am the spirit you have to say 12 times because there are 12 petals to this

beautiful set of heart mother I am the spirit please say Delta please don't

feel good please don't feel guilty please don't feel guilty you must know

that God Almighty is the ocean of love he is the ocean of compassion and last

of all he is the ocean ocean of forgiveness so don't feel guilty don't

judge yourself you have to achieve your glory by understanding that you are

glorious so don't have any diffidence just say with full confidence mother I

am the spirit now again don't feel guilty please don't

feel guilty is the biggest catch and don't feel guilty is wrong to feel it is

harmful is self-destructive don't feel guilty for anything now raise your hand

on to the base of the neck on the left hand side take it backwards a little bit

press it hard and here you have to say press it hard at the back take it at the

back little bit yes furthermore furthermore yeah press it hard hold it

hard here is the center when you feel guilty it gets caught

so now 16 times you have to say mother I am NOT GUILTY I am not guilty I am NOT

duty and if you are indulging too much into this kind of a thing and still you

believe that you are guilty then say eight hundred and eight times as a

punishment sixteen times

sixteen times hmm

now take this hand on your forehead across this hand right hand left hand

towards me on your forehead across forehead forehead is where my red mark

is across left hand towards me now here is the center of Lord Jesus Christ so

you have to say mother please I want to forgive everyone I want to forgive

everyone I forgive everyone say it from your heart it's a myth not to forgive

it's a myth because when you don't forgive what are you doing and when you

forgive also what are you doing it's a myth get over it just say I forgive

everyone you can say shri mataji I forgive everyone now say it from your

heart don't feel guilty please don't feel guilty if you are feeling guilty

then it will not work out you may put your hand at the back of your head a

back of your head without feeling guilty guilty you have to say O Lord if I have

done any mistakes please forgive me but not to feel guilty again I see if I have

done any mistakes knowingly unknowingly please forgive me

again feeling guilty just say please forgive me he is the

ocean of forgiveness don't have to bother much about it now is there please

don't feel guilty still catching on that Center all right now put your right hand

on top of your head at the fontanel bone area place your palm hard on the center

of the head and try to move your head in a way it is clockwise try to move your

scalp pressing hard with your palm at this point again I cannot cross your

freedom so you have to say mother I want my realization please give me my

realization please say this seven times because there are seven seats of all the

centers now put down your hand don't open your

eyes please put left hand on top of your hand and see if there's a cool breeze

coming in just put your left hand on top of your head I see there's a cool breeze

coming

just feeling little bit raised higher raised higher move it forward backward

see now if there is a cool breeze coming it

move on this side ready take it this side

is it coming cool breeze say those it is coming yes coming all right good idea is

it coming say loudly scoot now ask the question by putting left hand towards me

and right hand on top of your head ask a question mother is this the cool breeze

of the Holy Ghost you'll get it more three times put your

hands up all those who are feeling it also put up your hands now open your

eyes watch me without thinking put up your hands like this and ask a question

ask a question in your heart is this the breeze of the Holy Ghost

is this the chaitanya is this the brahma is this the all-pervading power of god

is this do you feel more when you ask questions yes say it loudly ah good now

in your hands you see yourself Metta now in the hands

those who are feeling the cool breeze raise your hands all of you both your

hands all those who are feeling the cool breeze raise your hands

scrape is great keep it this side also just keep your

hands up I would like to see who are getting the cool breeze higher good you

didn't feel it you win very so may God bless it now all right not yet we'll

work up all right please put down your hands thank you

very much now those who are not feeling please raise your hands so the others

who are here can help you and find out why you are not feeling it but this is

just the beginning of your seed sprouting just the beginning you have to

now grow into it and become your own masters which is Barisan and this is the

very crucial time for you say the first one month if you could work it out for a

month properly I am sure you all can be masters is not much we have the program

in the center here luckily we have a very nice Center and very nice people

they will give you the address which you should have please attend it

at least for a month give that

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