We fight a lot over how we split the housework.
I don't remember a day, when I ever had a fight.
Hey guys it's Cathy Cat. Today we are gonna go and ask Japanese people if they ever
fought with their partner or if they are the kind of people who keep it in. Let's go
and find out. Don't forget to subscribe to our channel for more videos from Japan and click on the
notification bell so you don't miss them. Let's go and ask Japanese.
We hear Japanese people are shy. Do you fight with your loved one? Or not?
Make that 3 times larger. Longer longer longer!
Stop perfect! .... Nice one.
I have never.... nooo
Japanese couples pick fights after all. - We do!
Have you been fighting since you started going out? - We fight a lot!
We have a fight once a week. - What's the most common reason for fights?
Things around the house. like the washing and such.
Food it the most common one. - Are you living together? - We are married!
Congratulations! - Yes and thats why...
we have fights about our future together.
We have different opinions and that's when we fight.
Housework is the most common reason for fights now? - We fight about it.
About how we separate the work load and such.
Is it a "do more" or "do it properly" kind of fight?
It's about who cooks more food.
I make the food too but I wanted her to cook more often.
One thing I get told a lot is that I let my clothes lay around.
She gets angry if I don't tidy it away. - How often do you cook a week?
If I cook 6 times, he cooks 4 times.
You want her to cook even more? - No before that, it was 8 against 2 times.
You cooked 8 meals and she two? - Yes. That's why we fought.
I said I wanted to eat more of her cooking. - So you changed that now...
Yes right now, that fight is over.
But the clothes that are lying around, that hasn't changed yet.
They are all scattered over the floor.
Do you think you can solve that issue? - I can try.
What was the biggest fight you ever had?
I lost our engagement ring....
That's why I don't have it now.
That's a big one. - Im sorry. - How angry did she get?
I couldn't apologize enough. - How angry were you?
I was at the brink of tears.
That's bad. Did you find a way to make it up to her?
We are still trying. - Can you not...
just buy a new one? - I am thinking about it.
I still hope that I will find it somehow.
I am still searching. - Or just give one at the next anniversary.
Maybe - Good idea. - You can say that louder.
So you fight with your boyfriend. About what? - About banal things.
Right? - Like what?
Being to persistent about things.
And then I get angry. - What persistent things?
Tickling and such. - Cut it out!
How do you get angry. - I just...
kick him saying "cut it out"
So you don't fight? - I cant remember a day when I fought.
What do you do if your partner does something you hate?
I won't be able to tell him. - The shy type? - I can't tell people.
You swallow your feelings? - Instead I will tell my friends.
I won't tell my partner. - And release the stress with friends.
Yes. - Why do you think some Japanese people can't say it directly.
Actually, I wonder how foreigners can say it directly.
Silence is normal? - I think about the consequences.
and don't want our relationship to go a bad way.
You hold back your feelings and tell your friends. - That's how I do it.
Are you angry at your partner right now? - He never tidies his clothes up ...
he doesn't wash the dishes. Lots of little things.
YEs that's thing. - So you never fight. How so?
I hate fights. - What do you do when you're angry then?
I tell my friends instead. - I don't get angry at all.
And if you were to get angry?
I would confide in my friends. - Sounds peaceful instead of a fight.
Do you think Japanese girls are scared of fighting? - We are.
No no no, we pick fights. Tell us why?
If I don't like something, I tell my partner.
and that's how we SOLVE or issues. He was angry at me too. But we solved it.
I apologize or he apologizes.
You don't swallow you feelings but say them. - I do.
What was the biggest fight you ever had with your boyfriend?
I started doubting his loyalty, and we talked about it.
How did you solve it? - By talking. He explained thing to me.
He showed me proof. That's how we became ok again.\
You were worried he was cheating on you? - Yes. - And he showed you proof he wasn't? - Yes.
We talked about it properly. - What was your biggest fight
so far? - My boyfriend was super jealous.
When I told him I was going home with friends...
he would say "why? You should go home with me.!
He was like that. So we fought a lot.
How do I say this... suffocating....
Was that suffocating, because he took your freedom away? - Yes.
I like having my own space. If I get tied down too much, I won't be happy.
So you fought. How did you resolve it? - Well...
We spoke on the phone.
And I told him that I didn't like it. - Did he understand you? - Maybe.......
I have never had a big fight but little banal things.
Being late for our dates. We were both school kids at the time.
So, we only had small fights. Going for meals...
and him being late deciding where to go. Small annoying things.
How did you solve those issues. - Just leave it. You'll forget it eventually.
You all seem to have different ways to solve your fights.
You have never had a fight with the girls you went out with? - Never.
We had strong discussions, but never a fight. - But you are currently single...?
I am dating someone. - And you never fight? - Never.
I think ahead ...
I might be wrong or she might be wrong. We know that ourselves right?
So we don't need to fight about it. - If there is an issue, how do you resolve it?
If there is a problem... how do we solve it....
We have to find a way to make it up to each other. - How? - With... hugs and such...
Make it up with a hug. - Yes, then we want to spend more time with each other.
You have never fought with your partner? - Yes. - You're dating? - No single.
When there was an issue before, how did you solve it?
We say what is on our mind. But we don't fight.
One person gives up before it comes to that.
So I never fought. - So when it comes to fights, you rather discuss? - Yes.
Do you swallow your feelings for the sake of your boyfriend? - Yes. - And you?
I will never swallow my feelings. I am selfish.
I want us both say what's on our mind.
and find a solution in the end. I don't hold back.
I don't feel the stress. I just let it go.
I try not to be bothered by things too much. - Thank you.
While older generations sometimes swallowed their feelings for the sake of creating harmony
for the whole of the family, younger generations say NO, we are fighting
and say the things we want to say... It seems to be a thing for Japanese girls though,
that they can't or won't fight because they feel afraid that their partner will
hate them for it. How is with you? Do you fight or do you not fight
with you partner? Are you the person who swallows their feelings in order to make the other person happy or...
Do you actually believe in saying the things and making sure there are no barriers between you is the solution
to your problem? ... Write us a comment down NOW in the comment box
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(Thank you for using the subtitle function! Hope it helped you understand.l) (^-^)/
(English subtitles by Ask Japanese)
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